When I am in a place of comfort and prosperity (aka… when there is no shaking, suffering, persecution or trials)… the problem is that I am not looking for God to be Himself.

To be Jehovah-Jireh… everything that I need. The God who satisfies me.

My soul has never been satisfied by any of my efforts to satisfy my needs.

My soul has only ever been satisfied in my desperation on God.

So… just like a millionaire isn’t focused on the dollar that he gives to the beggar, but instead on the interaction with the beggar, I am learning that God isn’t focused primarily on meeting my needs, but on the interaction between Him & I.

The aim: I have decided to let the shaking be my car that drives me onto the bridge of desperation, that leads me to the place of satisfaction.

Here is my update and details on where I have been!

In April I completed my final year of pastoral training at Southland Church School of Ministers and then was planning to jump back into blogging.

Just like the majority of people my life was unexpectedly disrupted by COVID and COVID restrictions. My work in Crisis Services became intensified and week after week from April until August work days became longer and more intense. More suicidal ideation. More domestics challenges inside families. More depression and anxiety. Tons of isolation, of course!

My intense work schedule kept on, but along the way in May I was hired as a pastor at a church 1.5 hours away. We strongly felt the call to accept and so in August we moved!

Now. I’m back! 😊

To follow

This is song #4 in my Blog Series “7 Songs in 7 Days“. See below for a printable PDF.

I wrote this between Nov 2018 – July 2019. It was inspired by two things:

1. The life and legacy of Esther Ahn Kim. A great woman of faith who lived in Korea! Check out her amazing incredible and life-changing story in the book “If I Perish”. Esther’s example of relying on God to meet and help her in her times of trouble. And I am not just talking difficult hard-ships, I am talking at the edge of the sword of death, and then she invites in Jesus’ presence to manifest and change her emotions, her outlook, and ultimately the results – even though the suffering and trials don’t change. What a testimony, and what an example that we can all use, especially in today’s world that is shifting and moving in bad directions.
2. In my year of bible school last year at School of Ministers in Southland, my class of year 2 students and I learned so much about the love and power of God and how it changes whatever situation we are in.

Out of these inspirations, God helped me craft this song.

“Put me in Jesus’ arms, and I know I am even safe in the darkest places”.

I am using PDFs to provide the best formatting on these blogs. Here it is:

All the best,

Kris

On the way…

To follow…

This is song #1 in my Blog Series “7 Songs in 7 Days“. See below for a printable PDF.

I wrote this between Dec 2017 – Aug 2019. Why did it take so long? Some songs just sit with me, over time. The bulk of it came over the course of the first two days, but then after months of revising (with long seasons of it just sitting, without me looking at it), it is now done. This song was inspired by the process of renewal that God has taken my church through. God has touched, healed, and blessed many of us in profound ways and He continues to as time goes on. This song is inspired by many key verses for our church, as well as key concepts (such as his sovereignty, listening prayer, and inner healing). I am using PDFs to provide the best formatting on these blogs. Here it is:

Enjoy your day,

Kris

No misunderstandings please: I am not writing 7 songs in 7 days. I am posting 7 songs in 7 days. 🙂

These are songs I have been writing over the past 3 years. For me song writing is a form of personal healing and expression. I write mostly for myself and God, and I sing to him by myself in my own worship times – which by the way I highly recommend doing if you are musically inclined and enjoy worshiping God!

Each of these songs comes with a brief note on who or what life event inspired the song and also the date (or time period) that I wrote the song. I plan to also add recordings when I have time. For now here’s the titles of the songs that I am posting. Thanks for taking an interest!

The God who Carries Us (Joyful, Generous, Fearless)

Forever Trust You

Stillness with You

Jesus Arms

James’ Song

Grace to Stand

“Smooches Down” (Lullaby)

Take care,

Kris

One of the most intricate, sensitive, and complicated aspects of life is relationships.

What is your experience with work relationships?

Some of us love em, some of us really do not. For some of us work relationships can feel like a whole new set of relationship challenges. Why? Because we go to work for reasons such as living out our passions, making a paycheck, and getting a job done. Some of us may go to work for the relationships, but no matter how little or how much you value work relationships, if you work in a team environment you know that relating with others at work is unavoidable. In many cases we don’t have the option to isolate at work.

For myself, I work in Mental Health Crisis Support and Counselling, an environment that creates and requires high-level responsibility, constant low-level stress, and at times high-level stress for ALL team members, not just some. My work environment will sooner burn out, harden, or even traumatize employees who do not have adequate self-care and personal resources.

Working here, I have often had this thought: “the hardest thing about this job is navigating my interactions with my coworkers”. Not the work we do with clients! I think that is for two reasons: (1) the higher stress environment affects all of us, like I said, but also (2) it shows the complexity but also the importance of working on a team when we are all so different.

Recently, someone gave me the feedback that at work I come across somewhat prideful.

Ouch, hard to hear… but thank you. Very important to me to know this, because I don’t want to come across that way.

Reflecting on this comment and on how I come across at work has been a good experience for me, and today I made a good step forward. The Holy Spirit asked me to take on a challenge (I love the Holy Spirit, because he is so on point). He asked me to commit for 1 week (5 work days) to do this before everything I do at work: whenever my work involves a coworker then say to myself the word “team” and let the weight of that word impact my actions before I respond, react, act, or speak.

I started today, and man did it change my outlook of one situation I encountered at work today. Let’s be honest, I responded differently. I responded better. I responded less selfish and narrow-minded.

My commitment is to not only do “teamwork” with my coworkers, but to do “team work” all of the time.

I’ll try to writer about how this goes after my 5 shifts are done.